Women, their own worst enemy

I sit in my tiny cubicle and I type. I sit in dread because I know that at any moment she would appear and would have something nasty to say. I school myself to ignore her, but even as I do it, I know it is an exercise in futility. I would still be affected by whatever she has to say.

My back aches, my tummy hurts. I press my hands against my side praying that the pain I feel would not seep through to affect my unborn child. A stack of work is piled high before me and I struggle to weed my way through, fighting the rising nausea, struggling to swallow the saliva that rapidly fills my mouth, fighting the urge to gag. But this is also an exercise in futility.

I have used stacks of napkins and soaked rags. I now have a bin permanently at my side… and as nausea rises, my knees too weak to move, I reach involuntarily for the bin.

“Oh geed!”

I heard her before I saw her. She walks past my cubicle; face twisted with disgust and exclaims, “She’s nasty!!”

Humiliation makes my face burn. I try to focus on the work before me, but my hands shake, my fingers can’t find the keys. Tears fill my eyes. I won’t let them fall.

It has been like this for weeks. I am three months pregnant and in the throes of morning sickness. I have tried all possible medication for nausea with no change. I had expected the symptoms to abate by the beginning of second semester, but as my tummy rises, the level of my nausea also increases.

A tiny part of me wishes that I weren’t pregnant, just so that I wouldn’t be tormented as I am now and unable to do anything about it, but I banish the though before it gains root. This is a pregnancy my husband and I planned for and as difficult as it may be, no external factor would get in the way.

But I am particularly pained by the woman’s attack. We aren’t friends. We were at one time, but that relationship went south after some frivolous argument. Since then she has gone to great pains to make my job difficult, making catty remarks about my appearance, my relationships and my financial status. I am a temporary worker, she has the security of being permanently employed with several years of service under her belt. She therefore uses my vulnerability as a whip with which to constantly lash out and often makes veiled threats about my future with the organisation.

These I could handle. I did not expect her to be so nasty about my unborn child though. What did he ever do to her. I expected her to be more mature, particularly since she is a mother of three herself.

I feel alone at this moment, for though others notice the way she treats me and though they all agree that her behaviour is unprovoked, no one would stand up to her and tell her that her behaviour is unacceptable.

I resolve to confront her.

Six Months pass.

Confrontation behind us.

I got the opportunity to tell her how I felt. I also gave her the opportunity to address any problems she may have with me, which would cause her to act the way she did. She could only that by succumbing to my nausea I was nasty.

.>sigh< I wish I could have helped her there.

I even made a special visit to my gynaecologist to address it, but he said there was nothing I could do but wait.

Funny, the men I worked with are more understanding.

Anyways... all of that is now behind me.

My beautiful son is here. The spitting is over.

I am now permanently employed as she is and I have heard that her daughter has since been bitten by the pregnancy bug, and feels as I did. Oh Karma... It is only my hope now that this lady would be more mature the next time she addresses a fellow female rather than seek to punish for having a fertile womb.

It is unfortunate when women are victimised in the workplace. It is even more unfortunate when the aggressor is also female. It takes us back to before the 1960s and negates the efforts of our ancestors who fought for the rights of women to establish themselves in the corporate world.
When a woman tries to victimise another woman for the very things that makes her female, what does that say for the many strides we have made addressing reproductive rights, domestic violence, maternity leave, equal pay, sexual harassment, and sexual violence?